‘Give sorrow words. The grief that does not speak whispers the o’erfraught heart and bids it break.’ From Macbeth, William Shakespeare.
Regret can come about because we are disappointed with ourselves, perhaps there is something we wish we’d said or done for our loved one. This can play on our minds. Someone put it like this “Still I find myself bargaining in my head what I could have done differently. If there was something I could have done that would have changed how everything turned out.”
We can also feel guilty because we somehow escaped the illness or accident that took our loved one. We can even feel guilty when we start to feel ready to move forward with our lives and this can hold us back.
When this happens it can be helpful to talk to someone to try and determine what is false guilt versus real guilt. So often we can be so hard on ourselves and hold ourselves to a far higher standard than we would to anyone else.
It can also really help to join a bereavement group and meet with others who understand what we are going through. Our next Bereavement Journey course starts on Thursday 17 April, Leighton Buzzard library at 1pm. If you are someone considering joining but for various reason you are not sure, perhaps some feedback from our last course will help:
“At first reluctant to attend but glad I did. Gave me a chance to talk through feelings of loss and find support from others and this continues in times of need.”
“When you have lost someone so close to you it’s hard to come to terms with it but meeting other people who have also lost someone makes you feel you're not alone and you seem able to cope better.”
We are one of over 400 registered Bereavement Journey courses running nationally.
For more information and to register on the next local course see www.lifeofhope.online/bereavement