I was reminded of this recently when I had cause to put it to use uttering the famous line..” would you like to see Emmas bad toe?”
I can just imagine the reaction of passersby when I utter this funny phrase but the truth is it WORKS.
With children age 12 month to 5 years the promise of a glimpse of my dodgy toe can stop a tantrum in its tracks!
The fact is distraction can be a powerful tool for a child. It’s a way of changing thought patterns, of shifting focus.
Teaching children the art of distraction can also teach them a coping mechanism for the future.
I use distraction when faced with many situations that require a swift action.
In this case a little meltdown about leaving a park. At two little P is desperate for independence and control. She wants to make her own decisions and have some autonomy. SHE will decide when she leaves somewhere thank you very much Emma!
But her decision isn’t always the most informed shall we say..(eg we need to get home for lunch or she’ll miss her nap window!)
So before she gets her little self upset I sweep in with something to distract her instantly.
This works anywhere where a tantrum in imminent.
Only last week in a shop when a little one was demanding some sweeties I emitted a shocked gasp and a “oh my goodness was that a BIRD in the shop!?” Impending show down averted and we looked for the ‘bird’ everywhere until we left, when I promptly pointed out a pigeon outside and said “THERE he is!”
I also find this helps my adorable H who has autism. He can get caught up in behaviour patterns like shouting or jumping when he’s feeling something intensely. In the case of last week it was hunger. I’m usually prepared but we’d got sidetracked on a walk and were late back. H felt that shouting might help so he was happily shouting “my tummy is EMPTY!’ On repeat alongside an otherwise peaceful woodland walk along the canal!
I resorted to the old toe trick, faking a stumble and a “oh no! My bad toe! Help Emma with a plaster will you H?”
Problem solved.
This trick doesn’t just work on little ones mind. It can work on teens too, if nothing else to make them smile! A little inappropriate behaviour in a social setting is guaranteed to tickle even the most stoic teen. For example we were in a clothes shop were my own daughter was becoming more and more despondent looking for the right pair of jeans.
So we headed to the accessories department where I proceeded to wear a selection of silly hats and sunglasses..the pure second hand embarrassment she felt was enough to take her mind of the anxiety of not liking herself in a mirror!
I admit these things take practice.
But if you have a few phrases and ideas ready it will make the world of difference between panic and calm in a stressful situation.
It even works on yourself. If I’m feeling excessively anxious I try to distract myself with an activity. Or, if I’m dwelling too much on something that’s making me unhappy I try to shake up my thought processes with something pleasant to think about.
Try it!